Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.

Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. A La Grecque, Aireys Inlet VIC
  2. Aria, Brisbane QLD
  3. Ashcrofts, Blackheath NSW
  4. Bacash VIC
  5. Balla NSW
  6. Bentley Restaurant & Bar NSW
  7. Beppi’s NSW
  8. Bib&Tucker WA
  9. Bistro Guillaume WA
  10. Bistro Molines, Mount View NSW
  11. Black Bird QLD
  12. Black Cow Bistro, Launceston TAS
  13. Brae, Birregurra VIC
  14. Bread and Bone Wood Grill SA
  15. Bridgewater Mill, Bridgewater SA
  16. Brooks VIC
  17. Buon Ricordo NSW
  18. Cafe Sopra NSW
  19. Catfish, Ballarat VIC
  20. Celsius Restaurant & Bar SA
  21. Char NT
  22. China Lane NSW
  23. Chris’s Beacon Point, Apollo Bay VIC
  24. Cinnamon Club SA
  25. Coda VIC
  26. Coppa Spuntino QLD
  27. Cumulus Inc VIC
  28. Da Mario NSW
  29. Dandelion VIC
  30. Epocha VIC
  31. Felix NSW
  32. Fins, South Kingscliff NSW
  33. Flying Fish NSW
  34. France-Soir VIC
  35. Franklin TAS
  36. Gerard’s Bistro QLD
  37. Glebe Point Diner NSW
  38. GOMA Restaurant QLD
  39. Guillaume NSW
  40. Il Bacaro VIC
  41. Il Centro QLD
  42. Innocent Bystander, Healesville VIC
  43. Jellyfish QLD
  44. Kepos St Kitchen NSW
  45. La Bonta, Kyneton VIC
  46. La Scala on Jersey NSW
  47. Lilotang QLD
  48. Lox Stock & Barrel NSW
  49. Luxembourg VIC
  50. Madame Hanoi SA
  51. Mamasita VIC
  52. Minamishima VIC
  53. Mister Bianco VIC
  54. Mocan & Green Grout ACT
  55. Moon Park NSW
  56. Mr Wong NSW
  57. Ms G’s NSW
  58. Nine Fine Food WA
  59. No 4 Blake Street WA
  60. No. 8 by John Lawson VIC
  61. Nomad NSW
  62. Novaro’s,Launceston TAS
  63. O Bar and Dining NSW
  64. Ocha VIC
  65. Ottoman Cuisine ACT
  66. Pei Modern VIC
  67. Pei Modern NSW
  68. Petite Mort WA
  69. Pipeclay Pumphouse, Mudgee NSW
  70. Pipers of Penola, Penola SA
  71. Port Phillip Estate VIC
  72. Prego WA
  73. Prive 249 QLD
  74. Public QLD
  75. Pulp Kitchen ACT
  76. Restaurant Orana SA
  77. Rockpool Bar & Grill NSW
  78. Sails, Noosa Heads QLD
  79. Sayers Sister WA
  80. Seaduction, Surfers Paradise QLD
  81. Shiki SA
  82. Shira Nui VIC
  83. Social Eating House, Broadbeach QLD
  84. Temporada ACT
  85. Ten Minutes By Tractor, Main Ridge VIC
  86. The Carlton Wine Room VIC
  87. The Dispensary Enoteca, Bendigo VIC
  88. The Gala Restaurant WA
  89. The Graham VIC
  90. The Grand VIC
  91. The Pot Food & Wine SA
  92. The Town Mouse VIC
  93. Tipo 00 VIC
  94. Tomah Gardens, Bilpin NSW
  95. Uccello NSW
  96. Union Dining VIC
  97. Vini NSW
  98. Wills Domain, Yallingup WA
  99. Yering Station Wine Bar, Yarra Glen VIC
  100. Yoshii NSW

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

Why the Khmer Rouge tried to bake a stuffed fox

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

New Pastry Generator

With the advent of the cronut, humanity has entered a new golden age of pastry. Freed from the shackles of tradition, patissiers can now start a craze by pouring any number of unrelated recipes straight into the deep fryer. Uninspired? Let the random pastry generator do the work of original human thought.

You should go cook:


Press reload for more new pastry ideas.

Food Idea Generator

Are you a chef who has hit a creative wall? A home cook who has prepared everything that a Nathan Myhrvold-led team can throw at you?

Now that Ferran Adria is out of business, surely a machine can take his place as an inspiration for cooks too lazy to go foraging or grow their own food. I present to you my food idea generator.

It has currently made around 3,000 random modernist cuisine recipes for you to try. A handful look truly delicious but most are nauseating..

Try it for yourself here.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:

Jorge Colombaris

Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.