Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.

Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. 10 William St NSW
  2. 121BC NSW
  3. Aarli Bar, Broome WA
  4. Abla’s VIC
  5. Akiba ACT
  6. Appellation at the Louise, Tanunda SA
  7. ARIA Restaurant NSW
  8. Bar H Dining NSW
  9. Berowra Waters Inn NSW
  10. Bistro Dom SA
  11. Bistro Guillaume WA
  12. Bistro Molines, Mount View NSW
  13. Bistro Vue VIC
  14. Brae, Birregurra VIC
  15. Byron Beach Cafe, Byron Bay NSW
  16. Catfish, Ballarat VIC
  17. Caveau, Wollongong NSW
  18. Cecconi’s VIC
  19. Chill on Tedder, Main Beach QLD
  20. China Doll NSW
  21. China Lane NSW
  22. Cicciolina VIC
  23. Circa 1876, Pokolbin NSW
  24. Clareville Kiosk NSW
  25. Da Orazio NSW
  26. Dainty Sichuan VIC
  27. David’s VIC
  28. Esca Bimbadgen, Pokolbin NSW
  29. Esquire QLD
  30. Ethos Eat Drink TAS
  31. FermentAsian, Tanunda SA
  32. Fish House, Burleigh Heads QLD
  33. Fish Shop NSW
  34. Flooded Gums, Bonville NSW
  35. Four in Hand NSW
  36. Franklin TAS
  37. Fuku WA
  38. Garagistes TAS
  39. Gladioli, Inverleigh VIC
  40. Gowings Bar & Grill NSW
  41. Green Park VIC
  42. Harrisons, Port Douglas QLD
  43. Hellenika, Nobby Beach QLD
  44. Icebergs Dining Room & Bar NSW
  45. Il Centro QLD
  46. Italian&Sons ACT
  47. Jonah’s NSW
  48. Josef Chromy Wines Cellar Door Restaurant, Relbia TAS
  49. Kiyomi, Broadbeach QLD
  50. Lark Hill Winery Restaurant ACT
  51. Long Apron, Mountville QLD
  52. Low Key Chow House WA
  53. Magill Estate Restaurant SA
  54. Maha VIC
  55. Malt Dining QLD
  56. Miki’s Open Kitchen, Margaret River WA
  57. Mocan & Green Grout ACT
  58. Momofuku Seiobo NSW
  59. Morks ACT
  60. Movida NSW
  61. Mr Wolf VIC
  62. Mrs. Jones Devonport TAS
  63. Must winebar WA
  64. One Penny Red NSW
  65. Ormeggio at the Spit NSW
  66. Osteria Balla NSW
  67. Pei Modern NSW
  68. Petite Mort WA
  69. Piqueos VIC
  70. Pleased to Meet You WA
  71. Polperro, Red Hill VIC
  72. Provenance, Beechworth VIC
  73. Quay NSW
  74. Racine, Orange NSW
  75. Ricky’s River Bar and Restaurant, Noosa Heads QLD
  76. Ristorante Fellini, Main Beach QLD
  77. Rockpool Bar & Grill VIC
  78. Rockpool Bar & Grill WA
  79. Ruby’s Mount Kembla, Kembla Heights NSW
  80. Sails, Noosa Heads QLD
  81. Seaduction, Surfers Paradise QLD
  82. Sean’s Panaroma NSW
  83. Seoul Food NT
  84. Shankers Authentic Indian Cuisine SA
  85. Shiki SA
  86. Silo Bakery and Cafe ACT
  87. Subo, Newcastle NSW
  88. Supernormal VIC
  89. Sushi E NSW
  90. Temporada ACT
  91. The Dispensary Enoteca, Bendigo VIC
  92. The Grand VIC
  93. The Ox and Hound Bistro, Beechworth VIC
  94. The Press Club VIC
  95. The Trustee Bar & Bistro WA
  96. The Woodhouse, Bendigo VIC
  97. Urbane QLD
  98. Voyager Estate Winery Restaurant, Margaret River WA
  99. Wills Domain, Yallingup WA
  100. Yu-u VIC

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

Why Porno for Pyros spent time in a sweat lodge with plastic bags

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:


Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.

2012 Food Trend Generator

Once again, it is the time of the year when food journalists wheel out the world’s worst portmanteau, the listicle, and predict where food trends will head in 2012. For a writer, they’re brilliant content. No editor is going to sack you if Cambodian does not become the new Thai or the world’s predicted hottest restaurant closes. Your audience does not hold you accountable if the hot food destination that you suggest collapses into civil war. So why not let a machine do the work?

Here’s my automatically generated predictions for the hot food trends of 2012. If they come true, you owe me money.

  1. Urban Nostalgia
  2. Canapes are the new Cider
  3. Hot Kitchen Tool: The Darning needle
  4. New Habit: Shooting Saturday
  5. Gastro Dude Food
  6. Food Destination: Maldives

Press Reload for increasingly accurate 2012 food trends.