Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.

Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. 121BC NSW
  2. A La Grecque, Aireys Inlet VIC
  3. A.Baker ACT
  4. Africola SA
  5. Akiba ACT
  6. Albert St Food & Wine VIC
  7. Alpha NSW
  8. Apple Daily Bar and Eating House WA
  9. Aubergine ACT
  10. Berowra Waters Inn NSW
  11. Bishop Sessa NSW
  12. Bistro Guillaume WA
  13. Black Fire ACT
  14. Bread and Bone Wood Grill SA
  15. Bread in Common WA
  16. Cafe Sopra NSW
  17. Capitol Bar & Grill ACT
  18. Carrington Place, Carrington NSW
  19. Catbird Seat QLD
  20. Chat Thai NSW
  21. Chill on Tedder, Main Beach QLD
  22. Circa VIC
  23. Clareville Kiosk NSW
  24. Coda VIC
  25. Courgette ACT
  26. Danjee NSW
  27. Darley’s, Katoomba NSW
  28. El Publico WA
  29. Eleonore’s, Yering VIC
  30. Esca Bimbadgen, Pokolbin NSW
  31. Euro QLD
  32. Felix NSW
  33. Flooded Gums, Bonville NSW
  34. Fratelli Paradiso NSW
  35. Frogmore Creek Restaurant, Cambridge TAS
  36. From Orient SA
  37. Fuku WA
  38. Galileo Buona Cucina WA
  39. Garagistes TAS
  40. Grossi Florentino VIC
  41. Guillaume NSW
  42. Hartsyard NSW
  43. Hellenic Republic VIC
  44. Hill of Grace Restaurant SA
  45. Jonah’s NSW
  46. Josef Chromy Wines Cellar Door Restaurant, Relbia TAS
  47. Kent St Kitchen NSW
  48. Kepos St Kitchen NSW
  49. Knee Deep, Wilyabrup WA
  50. Lalla Rookh WA
  51. Lebrina TAS
  52. Leonards Mill, Second Valley SA
  53. Les Bistronomes ACT
  54. Long Apron, Mountville QLD
  55. Manfredi at Bells, Killcare Heights NSW
  56. Merricote VIC
  57. Miki’s Open Kitchen, Margaret River WA
  58. Momofuku Seiobo NSW
  59. Monopole NSW
  60. Movida NSW
  61. No. 8 by John Lawson VIC
  62. Nomad NSW
  63. One Penny Red NSW
  64. Ormeggio at the Spit NSW
  65. Osteria at Stefano Lubiana Winery, Granton TAS
  66. Pleased to Meet You WA
  67. Pope Joan VIC
  68. Prego WA
  69. Print Hall WA
  70. Public Inn, Castlemaine VIC
  71. Red Cabbage Food & Wine WA
  72. Red Lantern on Riley NSW
  73. Remi De Provence TAS
  74. Restaurant Mason, Newcastle NSW
  75. Restaurant Two QLD
  76. Rockpool Bar & Grill NSW
  77. Ruby’s Mount Kembla, Kembla Heights NSW
  78. Rumi VIC
  79. Sagra NSW
  80. Saint Crispin VIC
  81. Sixpenny NSW
  82. Stillwater, Launceston TAS
  83. Subo, Newcastle NSW
  84. Supermaxi VIC
  85. Supernormal VIC
  86. Tani Eat & Drink, Bright VIC
  87. Temporada ACT
  88. Tempura Hajime VIC
  89. The Blue Swimmer at Seahaven, Gerroa NSW
  90. The Boathouse on Blackwattle Bay NSW
  91. The Elbow Room, McClaren Vale SA
  92. The European VIC
  93. The Independent, Gembrook VIC
  94. The Lane Vineyard Restaurant, Balhannah SA
  95. The Mayflower Restaurant SA
  96. The Tamarind, Maleny QLD
  97. The Vasse Felix Restaurant, Cowaramup WA
  98. Tipo 00 VIC
  99. Vini NSW
  100. Woodland House VIC

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

Why the Wimbledon tennis club apprises kale

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:

Jorge Colombaris

Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.

2012 Food Trend Generator

Once again, it is the time of the year when food journalists wheel out the world’s worst portmanteau, the listicle, and predict where food trends will head in 2012. For a writer, they’re brilliant content. No editor is going to sack you if Cambodian does not become the new Thai or the world’s predicted hottest restaurant closes. Your audience does not hold you accountable if the hot food destination that you suggest collapses into civil war. So why not let a machine do the work?

Here’s my automatically generated predictions for the hot food trends of 2012. If they come true, you owe me money.

  1. Zero-Waste Egotism
  2. Cheeseburgers are the new Caviar
  3. Hot Kitchen Tool: The Autoclave
  4. New Habit: Shandy Saturday
  5. New Nordic Vineyards
  6. Food Destination: Transnistria

Press Reload for increasingly accurate 2012 food trends.