Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.


Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. 1889 Enoteca QLD
  2. Ace Pizza WA
  3. Ajo NSW
  4. Akachochin VIC
  5. Apothecary 1918 SA
  6. Apple Daily Bar and Eating House WA
  7. ARIA Restaurant NSW
  8. Ashcrofts, Blackheath NSW
  9. Attica VIC
  10. Bistro at Banks, Marcus Hill VIC
  11. Bistro Dom SA
  12. Bread and Bone Wood Grill SA
  13. Cafe Nice NSW
  14. Cafe Paci NSW
  15. Cape Lodge, Yallingup WA
  16. Cecconi’s VIC
  17. Centonove VIC
  18. Chill on Tedder, Main Beach QLD
  19. Cinnamon Club SA
  20. Coast, Hervey Bay QLD
  21. Courgette ACT
  22. Cumulus Inc VIC
  23. Da Mario NSW
  24. Dainty Sichuan VIC
  25. Donovans VIC
  26. Duende WA
  27. El Publico WA
  28. Epocha VIC
  29. Estelle VIC
  30. Ester NSW
  31. Flying Fish NSW
  32. Frank Restaurant and Bar TAS
  33. Franklin TAS
  34. From Orient SA
  35. Garagistes TAS
  36. Georges on Waymouth SA
  37. Gordita QLD
  38. Hammer & Tong VIC
  39. Hare & Grace VIC
  40. Hartsyard NSW
  41. Hordern’s, Berry NSW
  42. Il Centro QLD
  43. Jasmin SA
  44. Lalla Rookh WA
  45. Lau’s Family Kitchen VIC
  46. Lebrina TAS
  47. Leonards Mill, Second Valley SA
  48. Lion Hotel SA
  49. Little NNQ SA
  50. Lotus Eaters, Cygnet TAS
  51. Magill Estate Restaurant SA
  52. Malt Dining QLD
  53. Me Wah TAS
  54. Mister Bianco VIC
  55. Montrachet QLD
  56. Movida VIC
  57. Movida Aqui VIC
  58. Mr Wong NSW
  59. No. 8 by John Lawson VIC
  60. Novaro’s,Launceston TAS
  61. Nunam WA
  62. Osteria at Stefano Lubiana Winery, Granton TAS
  63. Ottoman Cuisine ACT
  64. Petite Mort WA
  65. Pilu at Freshwater NSW
  66. Pipers of Penola, Penola SA
  67. Piqueos VIC
  68. Pope Joan VIC
  69. Press Food & Wine SA
  70. Prive 249 QLD
  71. Public QLD
  72. Public Inn, Castlemaine VIC
  73. Pulp Kitchen ACT
  74. Pure South VIC
  75. Restaurant Como, Blaxland NSW
  76. Rockpool NSW
  77. Sails, Noosa Heads QLD
  78. Salt Grill, Surfers Paradise QLD
  79. Sepia NSW
  80. Shankers Authentic Indian Cuisine SA
  81. Shira Nui VIC
  82. Social Eating House, Broadbeach QLD
  83. Spice Temple NSW
  84. Stunned Mullet, Port Macquarie NSW
  85. The Bathers’ Pavilion NSW
  86. The Bridge Room NSW
  87. The Carlton Wine Room VIC
  88. The Elbow Room, McClaren Vale SA
  89. The Lane Vineyard Restaurant, Balhannah SA
  90. The Salopian Inn, McLaren Vale SA
  91. The Tamarind, Maleny QLD
  92. The Trustee Bar & Bistro WA
  93. Three Japanese TAS
  94. Ume NSW
  95. Vini NSW
  96. Vintners Bar & Grill, Angaston SA
  97. Voyager Estate Winery Restaurant, Margaret River WA
  98. Vue de Monde VIC
  99. Windy Point SA
  100. Yoshii NSW

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

Why Rocket From The Crypt likes to be seen with the city of Budapest

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:

My Tlaxcalteca Axolotl

Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.

2012 Food Trend Generator

Once again, it is the time of the year when food journalists wheel out the world’s worst portmanteau, the listicle, and predict where food trends will head in 2012. For a writer, they’re brilliant content. No editor is going to sack you if Cambodian does not become the new Thai or the world’s predicted hottest restaurant closes. Your audience does not hold you accountable if the hot food destination that you suggest collapses into civil war. So why not let a machine do the work?

Here’s my automatically generated predictions for the hot food trends of 2012. If they come true, you owe me money.

  1. Chicken-fried Gluttony
  2. Christmas Puddings are the new Cupcakes
  3. Hot Kitchen Tool: The Gas Mask
  4. New Habit: Meatless Saturday
  5. Post-Tsunami Vineyards
  6. Food Destination: Chad

Press Reload for increasingly accurate 2012 food trends.