You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.
Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:
How Robin Thicke tried to kill yeast
Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.
With the advent of the cronut, humanity has entered a new golden age of pastry. Freed from the shackles of tradition, patissiers can now start a craze by pouring any number of unrelated recipes straight into the deep fryer. Uninspired? Let the random pastry generator do the work of original human thought.
You should go cook:
Press reload for more new pastry ideas.
I like building random things because it satisfies my innate need to make lists of synonyms. At the tweeted request of Steve Cumper, here’s a heirloom tomato name generator.
If you were a delicious heirloom tomato variety, your name would be:
Beef Lemon Drop
Press reload for a better tasting tomato.
Are you a chef who has hit a creative wall? A home cook who has prepared everything that a Nathan Myhrvold-led team can throw at you?
Now that Ferran Adria is out of business, surely a machine can take his place as an inspiration for cooks too lazy to go foraging or grow their own food. I present to you my food idea generator.
It has currently made around 3,000 random modernist cuisine recipes for you to try. A handful look truly delicious but most are nauseating..
Try it for yourself here.
Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:
Y tu Northcote tambien
Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.
I’ve just released a new bot into the wild, who invents a new name for a Melbourne restaurant twice a day, just like the Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator but delivered directly to the loving bosom of your twitter feed.
Follow it for regular, nonsensical updates.
In my last post Dr Maytel requested something that would generate development issues, and seeing that I’d neglected to send her (or anyone) a Christmas card and about half of my friends work for non-government organisations, here it is. You should hassle the UN to support:
NEEDS-BASED INTERNATIONAL AID COLLABORATION
Press reload to inspire a new development program
Once again, it is the time of the year when food journalists wheel out the world’s worst portmanteau, the listicle, and predict where food trends will head in 2012. For a writer, they’re brilliant content. No editor is going to sack you if Cambodian does not become the new Thai or the world’s predicted hottest restaurant closes. Your audience does not hold you accountable if the hot food destination that you suggest collapses into civil war. So why not let a machine do the work?
Here’s my automatically generated predictions for the hot food trends of 2012. If they come true, you owe me money.
- New Nordic Cosmopolitanism
- Capers are the new Cupcakes
- Hot Kitchen Tool: The Pacojet
- New Habit: Handmilling Sunday
- Gastro Vegetarianism
- Food Destination: Oman
Press Reload for increasingly accurate 2012 food trends.