Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.


Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. ┬┐Procedencia? VIC
  2. Aarli Bar, Broome WA
  3. ACME NSW
  4. Akachochin VIC
  5. Akiba ACT
  6. Alpha NSW
  7. Andre’s Cucina & Polenta Bar SA
  8. Apothecary 1918 SA
  9. Appellation at the Louise, Tanunda SA
  10. Apple Daily Bar and Eating House WA
  11. Aubergine ACT
  12. Beppi’s NSW
  13. Bishop Sessa NSW
  14. Bistro Dom SA
  15. Bistrode CBD NSW
  16. BLACK by Ezard NSW
  17. Bomba VIC
  18. Bridgewater Mill, Bridgewater SA
  19. Brooks VIC
  20. Cafe Sopra NSW
  21. Catfish, Ballarat VIC
  22. Celsius Restaurant & Bar SA
  23. Char NT
  24. Chill on Tedder, Main Beach QLD
  25. Chin Chin VIC
  26. Cinnamon Club SA
  27. Circa 1876, Pokolbin NSW
  28. Clarkes of Northbeach WA
  29. Co-Op Dining WA
  30. Cupitt’s Kitchen Ulladulla NSW
  31. Cutler & Co VIC
  32. Dandelion VIC
  33. Divido WA
  34. Du Fermier, Trentham VIC
  35. Ecco QLD
  36. Epocha VIC
  37. Four in Hand NSW
  38. Franklin TAS
  39. GOMA Restaurant QLD
  40. Hartsyard NSW
  41. Hentley Farm, Seppeltsfield SA
  42. Hill of Grace Restaurant SA
  43. Italian&Sons ACT
  44. Jonah’s NSW
  45. Josh’s Cafe, Berrima NSW
  46. La Scala on Jersey NSW
  47. Lanterne Rooms ACT
  48. Les Bistronomes ACT
  49. Lolli Redini, Orange NSW
  50. Lox Stock & Barrel NSW
  51. Madame Hanoi SA
  52. Malamay ACT
  53. Marque NSW
  54. Matteo’s VIC
  55. Monster Kitchen & Bar ACT
  56. Montrachet QLD
  57. Nine Fine Food WA
  58. Novaro’s,Launceston TAS
  59. Nunam WA
  60. O My, Beaconsfield VIC
  61. One Penny Red NSW
  62. Pei Modern VIC
  63. Pendolino NSW
  64. Popolo NSW
  65. Prego WA
  66. Quay NSW
  67. Racine, Orange NSW
  68. Reserve, Maleny QLD
  69. Restaurant Two QLD
  70. Ristorante Fellini, Main Beach QLD
  71. Rockpool Bar & Grill VIC
  72. Ruby’s Mount Kembla, Kembla Heights NSW
  73. Salt Grill, Surfers Paradise QLD
  74. Seaduction, Surfers Paradise QLD
  75. Shiki SA
  76. Spice Temple NSW
  77. Spirit House, Yandina QLD
  78. Stokehouse City VIC
  79. Street ADL SA
  80. Supernormal VIC
  81. Ten Minutes By Tractor, Main Ridge VIC
  82. Tetsuya’s NSW
  83. The Apollo NSW
  84. The Argus Dining Room, Hepburn Springs VIC
  85. The Independent, Gembrook VIC
  86. The Lane Vineyard Restaurant, Balhannah SA
  87. The Point VIC
  88. The Press Club VIC
  89. The Source TAS
  90. The Trustee Bar & Bistro WA
  91. Tipo 00 VIC
  92. Tonka VIC
  93. Town, Bangalow NSW
  94. Tulip, Geelong VIC
  95. Union Food & Wine VIC
  96. Urbane QLD
  97. Vini NSW
  98. Vintners Bar & Grill, Angaston SA
  99. Wharf Restaurant & Bar, Nowra NSW
  100. Yoshii NSW

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

Why The Offspring prizes Dulles airport

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

New Pastry Generator

With the advent of the cronut, humanity has entered a new golden age of pastry. Freed from the shackles of tradition, patissiers can now start a craze by pouring any number of unrelated recipes straight into the deep fryer. Uninspired? Let the random pastry generator do the work of original human thought.

You should go cook:

rotiflan

Press reload for more new pastry ideas.

Food Idea Generator

Are you a chef who has hit a creative wall? A home cook who has prepared everything that a Nathan Myhrvold-led team can throw at you?

Now that Ferran Adria is out of business, surely a machine can take his place as an inspiration for cooks too lazy to go foraging or grow their own food. I present to you my food idea generator.

It has currently made around 3,000 random modernist cuisine recipes for you to try. A handful look truly delicious but most are nauseating..

Try it for yourself here.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:

Huxtaqueria

Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.