Cooking Show Name Generator

Over the last month, some desperate TV exec has been googling for “Cooking Show Name Generator” and landing on my site, only to be disappointed by my most popular post, The Billy Bragg Safeword Generator. Just in case you’re not in need of a safe word, generate yourself a new cooking reality show by pressing the button.


Australia’s top 100 restaurants

With the Australian Financial Review‘s announcement of Australia’s fifth top 100 list of restaurants after the one below, Gourmet Traveller’s, Yelp’s and Dimmi’s, I started to get that feeling of deja vu about the usual suspects who will populate the list. Now that readers don’t care what a printed newspaper says about restaurants and just want a listicle of places that they can search for on Urbanspoon or Yelp, who better to build that listicle than the votes of Australia’s chefs who don’t need to be paid for collating the list? So asks the AFR. My answer: a random number generator.

Press reload to try and make a better list. Try once per annum to generate an annual award show and give them a series of imaginary hats.

  1. ¿Procedencia? VIC
  2. 2KW Bar and Restaurant SA
  3. A Tavola NSW
  4. Aarli Bar, Broome WA
  5. Africola SA
  6. Ajo NSW
  7. Akachochin VIC
  8. Aki’s NSW
  9. Albert St Food & Wine VIC
  10. Bar H Dining NSW
  11. Beppi’s NSW
  12. Berowra Waters Inn NSW
  13. Bib&Tucker WA
  14. Biota Dining, Bowral NSW
  15. Bistro at Banks, Marcus Hill VIC
  16. Brae, Birregurra VIC
  17. Byron Beach Cafe, Byron Bay NSW
  18. Cafe Paci NSW
  19. Cantina 663 WA
  20. Cape Lodge, Yallingup WA
  21. Catfish, Ballarat VIC
  22. Caveau, Wollongong NSW
  23. Char NT
  24. China Doll NSW
  25. Cinnamon Club SA
  26. Coogee Pavilion NSW
  27. Cutler & Co VIC
  28. Dainty Sichuan VIC
  29. Danjee NSW
  30. Donovans VIC
  31. Easy Tiger VIC
  32. Epocha VIC
  33. Est NSW
  34. Estelle VIC
  35. Fish Face NSW
  36. Fratelli Paradiso NSW
  37. Frogmore Creek Restaurant, Cambridge TAS
  38. Gastro Park NSW
  39. Gerard’s Bistro QLD
  40. Hare & Grace VIC
  41. Il Bacaro VIC
  42. Jasmin SA
  43. Kenji Modern Japanese SA
  44. Kitchen by Mike NSW
  45. La Scala on Jersey NSW
  46. Lanterne Rooms ACT
  47. Les Bistronomes ACT
  48. Lilotang QLD
  49. Lolli Redini, Orange NSW
  50. Longrain VIC
  51. Lox Stock & Barrel NSW
  52. Market Street Cafe, Mudgee NSW
  53. Mocan & Green Grout ACT
  54. Moda QLD
  55. Montrachet QLD
  56. Movida VIC
  57. Must winebar WA
  58. Nine Fine Food WA
  59. Northern Git VIC
  60. Nu Nu, Palm Grove QLD
  61. Osteria di Russo & Russo NSW
  62. Ottoman Cuisine ACT
  63. Paringa Estate, Red Hill South VIC
  64. Pastuso VIC
  65. Pata Negra WA
  66. Pei Modern VIC
  67. Pei Modern NSW
  68. Pendolino NSW
  69. Polperro, Red Hill VIC
  70. Prego WA
  71. Press Food & Wine SA
  72. Public QLD
  73. Public Dining Room NSW
  74. Rockpool Bar & Grill NSW
  75. Rockpool Bar & Grill WA
  76. Ruby’s Mount Kembla, Kembla Heights NSW
  77. Rumi VIC
  78. Sagra NSW
  79. Sailors Thai NSW
  80. Saint Crispin VIC
  81. Shira Nui VIC
  82. Silo Bakery and Cafe ACT
  83. Smoque ACT
  84. South on Albany, Berry NSW
  85. St Isidore, Milton NSW
  86. Tempura Hajime VIC
  87. Terre, Tuerong VIC
  88. The Argus Dining Room, Hepburn Springs VIC
  89. The Bridge Room NSW
  90. The Lane Vineyard Restaurant, Balhannah SA
  91. The Mayflower Restaurant SA
  92. The Salopian Inn, McLaren Vale SA
  93. Tonka VIC
  94. Town Hall Hotel VIC
  95. Town, Bangalow NSW
  96. Uccello NSW
  97. Ume NSW
  98. Westend Pump House TAS
  99. Wills Domain, Yallingup WA
  100. Yellow NSW

Vice is Hip Generator

You know that moment when you begin to suspect that a Twitter parody account is run by an algorithm? Maybe the Vice-like Twitter account @vice_is_hip is a bot, but just in case that it wasn’t, I built a bot to replace it. I present to you @vice_is_bot, generating an article for Vice every hour, on the hour.

Want to pitch something to Vice for yourself? You should write:

How Pharrell saw a vision of camel meat

Press reload for increasingly realistic ideas.

New Pastry Generator

With the advent of the cronut, humanity has entered a new golden age of pastry. Freed from the shackles of tradition, patissiers can now start a craze by pouring any number of unrelated recipes straight into the deep fryer. Uninspired? Let the random pastry generator do the work of original human thought.

You should go cook:

krodoppelmuffin

Press reload for more new pastry ideas.

Food Idea Generator

Are you a chef who has hit a creative wall? A home cook who has prepared everything that a Nathan Myhrvold-led team can throw at you?

Now that Ferran Adria is out of business, surely a machine can take his place as an inspiration for cooks too lazy to go foraging or grow their own food. I present to you my food idea generator.

It has currently made around 3,000 random modernist cuisine recipes for you to try. A handful look truly delicious but most are nauseating..

Try it for yourself here.

Melbourne Restaurant Name Generator: Mexican Edition

Since the City of Melbourne passed an edict that no new restaurant can get a liquor licence in Melbourne unless it serves a fish taco, my Melbourne restaurant name generator has become redundant. I’ve been meaning to write some reviews, but most of the new joints do a pretty good job of satirising themselves. So inspired by this tweet from Beechworth chef Michael Ryan, here’s a Mexican edition of the restaurant name generator. Name that new restaurant:

Señor Tulk

Press reload for more authentic Mexican suggestions. Also, inspired by my original generator, Willamette Week in Portland has made a local version.